All-Time Guilty Pleasure Songs - Planning

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Dexter
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All-Time Guilty Pleasure Songs - Planning

Post by Dexter »

Hello AMFers! I have decided to run a survey of the "guilty pleasure" songs of all-time. I have long been intrigued with the concept. We live in a time where music is available in a few taps and clicks. We also live in a time where all these lists by critics can be easily found and referenced to (as AM can attest). There is no denying, especially for us AMFers, that these lists, to a degree, influence our listening habits and inform us what songs are held in high esteem. In short, my idea of a guilty pleasure is probably in line with the description found in wikipedia , to quote "[a] guilty pleasure is something, such as a film, a television program or a piece of music, that one enjoys despite feeling that it is not generally held in high regard, or is seen as unusual or weird."

Other definitions are: "something you like, but feel guilty about liking, because you are aware that your fondness for said thing is a little embarrassing or not so great." (nypl.org); "n the real world, there are social pressures, signals that communicate preconceived notions of what music we can and can't like. How these break down can tell us a lot about how we see ourselves. Many of the reasons why people end up feeling "guilty" about music involve seemingly arbitrary external constraints." (complex); "ongs that most of us secretly like, love even, but probably keep to ourselves for playing loud in the car or for a Saturday morning spent doing chores." (udiscovermusic); "music that is supposedly so bad that people feel "embarrassed" listening to it" (bustle).

If I have to cite a personal example, I don't get the hate for "Two Princes" by Spin Doctors. I used to listen and jam to it all time in the mid 90's and now that I've seen all these lists in AM without the song (it even made a top awful songs of all time list), I keep thinking where did my ears go wrong.

Below are some talking points I came up with:
1. All songs are eligible, even novelty songs or even those listed in the AM top 10,000... or do you think like maybe the top 1,000 are "untouchables", a.k.a. no ones gets embarrassed listening to any of the 1,000 songs ?
2. If you don't believe in guilty pleasures/don't feel "guilty" in liking a song, then submit your top songs you enjoy listening to that does not deserve the reputation you think they get.

Rules on submissions:
1. The minimum list size is 20 songs, maximum is 100.
2. Post your list in another thread I'll be opening.
3. Submission will start the same time as the all-time songs poll, since I feel that in coming up with the list of the all-time songs it will also remind people of their "guilty pleasure" songs. Deadline will (edit: most likely be after the roll-out of the results of the all-time songs).
4. I will use the formula from recent the polls.

Any additional ideas, comments, rules, parameters, etc. are welcome.
Last edited by Dexter on Mon Mar 12, 2018 6:27 am, edited 3 times in total.
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Re: All-Time Guilty Pleasure Songs - Planning

Post by jamieW »

Since I've been listing "guilty pleasures" since first arriving on the forum, I'll undoubtedly participate in this. A question about the ranking, though: Does #1 represent our favorite guilty pleasure, or the overall song we feel guiltiest about? (For example, by far the song I feel the guiltiest for loving is an old high school favorite, "Heartbeat" by Don Johnson. However, if I was ranking guilty pleasures by how much I actually like them, I have others that would rank even higher.)
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Re: All-Time Guilty Pleasure Songs - Planning

Post by StevieFan13 »

I’m figuring out how not to make my list all Eurovision songs.
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Re: All-Time Guilty Pleasure Songs - Planning

Post by jamieW »

StevieFan13 wrote:I’m figuring out how not to make my list all Eurovision songs.
So much of this will definitely be up to individual interpretation. For example, one of my favorite songs of the decade is "I Feed You My Love" by Margaret Berger (from Eurovision), and I wouldn't list that one because I don't feel guilty about it in the slightest. I just think it's a great song.
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Re: All-Time Guilty Pleasure Songs - Planning

Post by Listyguy »

I'll definitely participate in this, I just need to figure out what is a guilty pleasure and what isn't...
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Re: All-Time Guilty Pleasure Songs - Planning

Post by Live in Phoenix »

Some websites are more than happy to let you know what is supposed to be the worst in music. We could post a few of these lists, and that could at least start a discussion. I remember the list below from the now-defunct Blender. Obviously, in lists like these, there are going to be outliers that make you say something like, "Hey screw you, pal, the Doors are great." I think that any song beloved enough to be in the AM main page top 2000 should be ineligible on our list. Other than that, even the most famous musicians have some lame music that might be defended by someone.

The 50 Worst Artists In Music History (Blender, circa 2003)
Found via: https://www.stereogum.com/4078/the_50_w ... ises/list/
50. Iron Butterfly
49. Toad The Wet Sprocket
48. Master P
47. Goo Goo Dolls
46. The Spin Doctors
45. Gipsy Kings
44. Manowar
43. Mike & The Mechanics
42. Rick Wakeman
41. Whitesnake
40. Blind Melon
39. Bob Geldof
38. [No #38 Listed!]
37. The Doors
36. 98 Degrees
35. Paul Oakenfold
34. Live
33. Japan
32. The Hooters
31. Arrested Development
30. Richard Marx
29. Skinny Puppy
28. Crash Test Dummies
27. Color Me Badd
26. Céline Dion
25. Jamiroquai
24. Bad English
23. Creed
22. Primus
21. The Alan Parsons Project
20. Howard Jones
19. Dan Fogelberg
18. Pat Boone
17. Benzino
16. Oingo Boingo (hey, screw you, pal)
15. Yanni
14. Yngwie Malmsteen
13. Mick Jagger
12. Tin Machine
11. Latyoa Jackson

10. Air Supply
09. Lee Greenwood
08. Vanilla Ice
07. Asia
06. Kansas
05. Starship
04. Kenny G
03. Michael Bolton
02. Emerson, Lake & Palmer
01. Insane Clown Posse
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Re: All-Time Guilty Pleasure Songs - Planning

Post by Live in Phoenix »

Something I certainly don't want to happen is for a beloved act to sweep our list, just because some jerk article out there said they were terrible, and then we're trying to act like some very acclaimed musician is a guilty pleasure.

Top 20 Worst Bands of All Time: The Complete List / L.A. Weekly
http://www.laweekly.com/music/top-20-wo ... st-2403868
20. Spin Doctors
19. The Raconteurs
18. Oasis
17. Phish
16. 4 Non Blondes
15. Pretty Ricky
14. Foreigner
13. Wings
12. Fleet Foxes
11. Red Hot Chili Peppers
10. Pussycat Dolls
9. Rush
8. Hootie & the Blowfish
7. Pearl Jam
6. Black Eyed Peas
5. Animal Collective
4. Sex Pistols (um, screw you, pal)
3. LCD Soundsystem
2. Eagles
1. Dave Matthews Band
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Re: All-Time Guilty Pleasure Songs - Planning

Post by Live in Phoenix »

I remember this book at the library. (It's not necessarily our job, though, to stand up for the very worst.)

The Worst Rock ’n’ Roll Records of All Time (1991) - Jimmy Guterman & Owen O’Donnell

The Fifty Worst Rock-And-Roll Singles of All Time
1. Berry, Chuck – My Ding a Ling
2. Think – Once You Understand
3. Charlene – I’ve Never Been to Me
4. Charlene & Stevie Wonder – Used to Be
5. Peter, Paul & Mary – I Dig Rock and Roll Music
6. Zager & Evans – In the Year 2525 (Exordium & Terminus)
7. Ronstadt, Linda – Back in the USA
8. Cher – You Better Sit Down Kids
9. McLean, Don – American Pie
10. Harris, Richard – MacArthur Park
11. Gibb, Andy & Victoria Principal – All I Have to Do is Dream
12. Chapin, Harry – Taxi
13. Chapin, Harry – Cat’s in the Cradle
14. Gold, Andrew – Lonely Boy
15. Reddy, Helen – I Am Woman
16. Knack – Good Girls Don’t
17. Knack – Baby Talks Dirty
18. Stills, Stephen – Love the One You’re With
19. Herman’s Hermits – I’m Henry VIII, I Am
20. Rolling Stones – Emotional Rescue
21. Carmen, Eric – All by Myself
22. Lewis, Huey & the News – Hip to be Square
23. Manfred Mann’s Earthband – Blinded by the Light
24. McFerrin, Bobby – Don’t Worry Be Happy
25. Ian, Janis – At Seventeen
26. O’Sullivan – Gilbert – Alone Again (Naturally)
27. Hollies – Stop in the Name of Love
28. Stevens, Cat – Moon Shadow
29. Art of Noise featuring Tom Jones – Kiss
30. Tyler, Bonnie – Faster Than the Speed of Night
31. Clapton, Eric – Wonderful Tonight
32. Melanie – Ruby Tuesday
33. Melanie – Brand New Key
34. Richie, Lionel – Dancing on the Ceiling
35. Stewart, Rod – Do Ya Think I’m Sexy
36. Smith, Hurricane – Oh Babe, What Would You Say?
37. Coolidge, Rita – Higher & Higher
38. Stewart, Amii – Knock on Wood
39. Simon & Garfunkel – the Dangling Conversation
40. Jacksons – State of Shock
41. Jagger, Mick & David Bowie – Dancing in the Street
42. Benatar, Pat – Sex as a Weapon
43. Wham! – Freedom
44. George Michael – Freedom ‘90
45. Adams, Bryan – Summer of ‘69
46. Frey, Glenn – the Heat is On
47. Seger, Bob – the Horizontal Bop
48. Everly Brothers – Ebony Eyes
49. Will to Power – Baby I Love Your Way/Freebird Medley
50. John Cougar – Jack and Diane

The Fifty Worst Rock-And-Roll Albums of All Time

1. Presley, Elvis – Having Fun with Elvis on Stage
2. Reed, Lou – Metal Machine Music
3. Dylan, Bob – Self Portrait
4. Crosby, Stills, Nash & Young – American Dream
5. Boone, Pat – Pat Boone (1957)
6. Milli Vanilli – the Remix Album
7. Chicago – at Carnegie Hall
8. Doors – Alive, She Cried
9. Grateful Dead – Europe ‘72
10. Yes – Tales from Topographic Oceans
11. Jethro Tull – Aqualung
12. Byrds – Byrds (1973)
13. Queen – Queen II
14. Queen – Live Killers
15. Anderson, Bruford, Wakeman, Howe – (same title)
16. Shaggs – Philosophy of the World
17. Shaggs – Shaggs’ Own Thing
18. Travolta, John – Travolta Fever
19. Moody Blues – Days of Future Passed
20. Various Artists – 70’s Hits: Great Records of the Decade – Original Recordings Vol 1
21. Dylan, Bob – Live at Budokan
22. Waters, Rogers – Radio K.A.O.S.
23. Parks, Van Dyke – Song Cycle
24. Who – Who’s Last
25. Rolling Stones – Still Life (American Concert 1981)
26. Bon Jovi – Slippery When Wet
27. Journey – Greatest Hits
28. Beach Boys – Still Cruisin’
29. Starship – Knee Deep in the Hoopla
30. Willis, Bruce – the Return of Bruno
31. Blood, Sweat and Tears – Blood, Sweat & Tears (1969)
32. Donovan – Greatest Hits
33. Astley, Rick – Whenever You Need Somebody
34. Emerson, Lake & Palmer – Tarkus
35. Starland Vocal Band – 4 X 4
36. Grey, Joel – Black Sheep Boy
37. REO Speedwagon – Life as We Know It
38. America – History: America’s Greatest Hits
39. Starr, Ringo – Stop and Smell the Roses
40. Starr, Ringo – Old Wave
41. Franklin, Aretha – La Diva
42. Phantom, Rocker & Slick – Phantom, Rocker & Slick
43. Sgt Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band – Original Soundtrack to the Motion Picture
44. Costello, Elvis & the Attractions – Goodbye Cruel World
45. Bowie, David – Never Let Me Down
46. Moore, Scotty – Guitar That Changed the World
47. Sheridan, Tony & the Elvis Presley TCB Band – (same title)
48. Lowe, Nick – Pinker and Prouder than Previous
49. Parker, Graham & the Rumour – The Parkerilla
50. U2 – Unforgettable Fire
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Re: All-Time Guilty Pleasure Songs - Planning

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Live in Phoenix wrote:Something I certainly don't want to happen is for a beloved act to sweep our list, just because some jerk article out there said they were terrible, and then we're trying to act like some very acclaimed musician is a guilty pleasure.

Top 20 Worst Bands of All Time: The Complete List / L.A. Weekly
http://www.laweekly.com/music/top-20-wo ... st-2403868
20. Spin Doctors
19. The Raconteurs
18. Oasis
17. Phish
16. 4 Non Blondes
15. Pretty Ricky
14. Foreigner
13. Wings
12. Fleet Foxes
11. Red Hot Chili Peppers
10. Pussycat Dolls
9. Rush
8. Hootie & the Blowfish
7. Pearl Jam
6. Black Eyed Peas
5. Animal Collective
4. Sex Pistols (um, screw you, pal)
3. LCD Soundsystem
2. Eagles
1. Dave Matthews Band
Ok I take severe offense to this list :lol:

There are at least 10 quality acts there. Also, what did LCD Soundsystem ever do to these guys? Like I get why people could hate Oasis or the Eagles, but LCD Soundsystem?
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Re: All-Time Guilty Pleasure Songs - Planning

Post by Live in Phoenix »

My father-in-law of course got pissed off that the Eagles were on there.

OK, this would be my notion of a proper list, at least as a starting point. Unranked at the moment, except that I've included AM rankings in parenthesis. Only "U Can't Touch This" is within the top 3000.

Barenaked Ladies - One Week (6134)
Pat Boone - Moody River (unranked)
Belinda Carlisle - Heaven is a Place on Earth (5132)
Color Me Badd - All 4 Love (unranked)
Crash Test Dummies - Mmm Mmm Mmm Mmm (4827)
Billy Ray Cyrus - Achy Breaky Heart (7907)
Céline Dion - If You Asked Me To (unranked)
Debbie Gibson - Lost in Your Eyes (unranked)
Goo Goo Dolls - Slide (unranked)
Amy Grant - Baby Baby (unranked)
Kenny G - Songbird (unranked)
Los Del Río - Macarena (Bayside Boys Mix) (4980)
Loverboy - Working for the Weekend (4640)
Richard Marx - Hazard (unranked)
MC Hammer - U Can't Touch This (2709)
Milli Vanilli - Girl I'm Gonna Miss You (unranked)
Milli Vanilli - Girl, You Know It's True (6466)
New Kids on the Block - You Got It (The Right Stuff) (7331)
Night Ranger - Sister Christian (5697)
REO Speedwagon - Keep On Loving You (5586)
Snow - Informer (6107)
Spin Doctors - Little Miss Can't Be Wrong (9650)
Spin Doctors - Two Princes (3120)
Vanilla Ice - Ice Ice Baby (unranked)
Whitesnake - Here I Go Again (3712)
Stevie Wonder - I Just Called to Say I Love You (4921)

More:
Jewel - Hands (unranked)
Jewel - Standing Still (unranked)

I drew some songs from here:
"50 Awesome Guilty Pleasure Songs We're Ashamed to Like (But Not Really)" by Complex [whatever that is]
http://www.complex.com/music/2013/03/50 ... ot-really/
Last edited by Live in Phoenix on Thu Mar 22, 2018 7:05 pm, edited 2 times in total.
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Re: All-Time Guilty Pleasure Songs - Planning

Post by StevieFan13 »

I still hate Eagles, but I’ll defend the Spin Doctors. (And Oasis - what the hell, LA Times?)
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Re: All-Time Guilty Pleasure Songs - Planning

Post by StevieFan13 »

Dave Barry, the American humorist, once did a poll about the worst songs ever. MacArthur Park by Richard Harris was #1, followed by Yummy Yummy Yummy (I Got Love in My Tummy) at #2 and Havin’ My Baby at #3.
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Re: All-Time Guilty Pleasure Songs - Planning

Post by StevieFan13 »

jamieW wrote:
StevieFan13 wrote:I’m figuring out how not to make my list all Eurovision songs.
So much of this will definitely be up to individual interpretation. For example, one of my favorite songs of the decade is "I Feed You My Love" by Margaret Berger (from Eurovision), and I wouldn't list that one because I don't feel guilty about it in the slightest. I just think it's a great song.
Of course, there are plenty of Eurovision songs I don’t feel guilty about enjoying at all (such as the one you mentioned). I’m thinking of the goofier ones, like this one, which won for Estonia in 2001:
[youtube]https://youtu.be/tbsOi2pGcjM[/youtube]
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Re: All-Time Guilty Pleasure Songs - Planning

Post by prosecutorgodot »

Maybe we should have a rule for this poll, disqualifying any songs in AM top 500 and artists in AM top 200. This might solve the popular artist sweeping problem.
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Re: All-Time Guilty Pleasure Songs - Planning

Post by Live in Phoenix »

This might be more principle than it's worth, but since I only had 1 song above within the AM top 3000, I might exclude "U Can’t Touch This" as if it's too good for this poll :lol:
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Re: All-Time Guilty Pleasure Songs - Planning

Post by Jirin »

Are we all ready to...get knocked down...and then get up again?

To me a guilty pleasure song isn’t necessarily one that’s unpopular or unacclaimed, more one that if you played in public you’d expect weird looks.

The thing about ‘worst ever’ lists is some people mistake them for ‘stuff I am most angry is popular and most want to stop hearing about’ lists.

And these lists...are...never gonna keep me down! ;)
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Re: All-Time Guilty Pleasure Songs - Planning

Post by Listyguy »

Jirin wrote: To me a guilty pleasure song isn’t necessarily one that’s unpopular or unacclaimed, more one that if you played in public you’d expect weird looks.
I agree with this interpretation.
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Re: All-Time Guilty Pleasure Songs - Planning

Post by StevieFan13 »

Might as well post that Complex list for inspiration:
Spice Girls "Wannabe" (1996)
Journey "Don't Stop Believin'" (1981)
Taylor Swift "I Knew You Were Trouble." (2012)
Amy Grant "Baby Baby" (1991)
Haddaway "What Is Love" (1993)
Vanessa Carlton "A Thousand Miles" (2002)
Belinda Carlisle "Heaven is a Place on Earth" (1987)
Taking Back Sunday "Cute Without The E" (2002)
Barenaked Ladies "One Week" (1998)
Paris Hilton "Stars Are Blind" (2006)
The All-American Rejects "Swing, Swing" (2002)
Britney Spears "Lucky" (2000)
City High "What Would You Do?" (2001)
New Kids On The Block "Please Don't Go Girl" (1988)
Lindsay Lohan "Over" (2004)
Wilson Phillips "Hold On" (1990)
Yellowcard "Ocean Avenue" (2004)
Boston "More Than A Feeling" (1976)
Hilary Duff "So Yesterday" (2003)
David Archuleta "Crush" (2008)
Modern English "I Melt With You" (1982)
Avril Lavigne "What the Hell" (2011)
Smash Mouth "All Star" (1999)
Backstreet Boys "As Long As You Love Me" (1997)
Incubus "Pardon Me" (2000)
Hot Chelle Rae "Tonight, Tonight" (2011)
Shontelle "T-Shirt" (2008)
Ke$ha "We R Who We R" (2010)
Simply Red "Something Got Me Started" (1991)
Limp Bizkit "Nookie" (1999)
Miley Cyrus "7 Things" (2008)
Jordy "Dur Dur D'être Bébé!" (1992)
Bruno Mars "Locked Out of Heaven" (2012)
Hawthorne Heights "Ohio is For Lovers" (2004)
John Mayer "Split Screen Sadness" (2003)
Andrea True "More More More" (1976)
Kitty Pryde "Okay Cupid" (2012)
Pitbull "I Know You Want Me (Calle Ocho)" (2009)
The Rocket Summer "So Much Love" (2007)
Kelly Clarkson "Since U Been Gone" (2004)
Snow "Informer" (1992)
New Radicals "You Get What You Give" (1998)
Mike Posner "Cooler Than Me" (2010)
Jamiroquai "Virtual Insanity" (1996)
Ini Kamoze "Here Comes the Hotstepper" (1994)
Cathy Dennis "Irresistible" (1992)
Gym Class Heroes "Viva la White Girl" (2006)
Don Omar f/ Lucenzo "Danza Kuduro" (2010)
The Pack "Candy" (2007)
Britney Spears f/ Nicki Minaj and Ke$ha "Til The World Ends (Femme Fatale Remix)" (2011)
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Re: All-Time Guilty Pleasure Songs - Planning

Post by Jirin »

A couple of those would definitely appear on my list but a few I also just consider good songs, like Pardon Me. I suppose anything associated with that late 90s post-post grunge area would potentially be considered embarrassing.
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Re: All-Time Guilty Pleasure Songs - Planning

Post by panam »

It would be interesting to get the right criteria for a guilty pleasure. I prefer not to be on the top RYM singles than top AM songs..
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Re: All-Time Guilty Pleasure Songs - Planning

Post by slick »

To me a "Guilty Pleasure" song is one that comes on the radio when you are in your car and when you get to a red light you roll up your windows so that no one hears what you are listening to. I feel a new playlist inspiration coming on...
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Re: All-Time Guilty Pleasure Songs - Planning

Post by bonnielaurel »

prosecutorgodot wrote:Maybe we should have a rule for this poll, disqualifying any songs in AM top 500 and artists in AM top 200. This might solve the popular artist sweeping problem.
Stevie Wonder's I Just Called to Say I Love You and Ebony and Ivory are often in lists of worst songs, so I think artists with high acclaim can still have a guilty pleasure song. Mull of Kintyre and Ob-La-Di Ob-La-Da come to mind as well.

I would include some of those songs from worst of all time lists, e.g. What's Up (4 Non Blondes), Don't Worry Be Happy, The Final Countdown... Also some teen pop, 80s synthpop (Wham!, Spandau Ballet...), Boney M., Samantha Fox, Julio Iglesias, a German schlager etc.
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Re: All-Time Guilty Pleasure Songs - Planning

Post by spiritualized »

Jirin wrote: To me a guilty pleasure song isn’t necessarily one that’s unpopular or unacclaimed, more one that if you played in public you’d expect weird looks. ;)
Well that defines about 75% of what I generally listen to :)
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Re: All-Time Guilty Pleasure Songs - Planning

Post by jamieW »

bonnielaurel wrote:
prosecutorgodot wrote:Maybe we should have a rule for this poll, disqualifying any songs in AM top 500 and artists in AM top 200. This might solve the popular artist sweeping problem.
Stevie Wonder's I Just Called to Say I Love You and Ebony and Ivory are often in lists of worst songs, so I think artists with high acclaim can still have a guilty pleasure song. Mull of Kintyre and Ob-La-Di Ob-La-Da come to mind as well.

I would include some of those songs from worst of all time lists, e.g. What's Up (4 Non Blondes), Don't Worry Be Happy, The Final Countdown... Also some teen pop, 80s synthpop (Wham!, Spandau Ballet...), Boney M., Samantha Fox, Julio Iglesias, a German schlager etc.
Bonnielaurel's absolutely right here - I could understand excluding songs down to a certain number, but all artists should be fair game. Part of the fun would be seeing some of the greatest artists of all-time showing up with songs that likely aren't their proudest moment. ("My Ding-a-Ling" would be a good example. Now there's one I actually can't stand, but I think I remember people on the forum admitting to liking it once.)

I'm wondering how strong the correlation will be between guilty pleasures and the time we were kids/teens. Probably more than half of my list will come from the eighties (including "Ebony and Ivory") when music was new to me and virtually everything sounded great.
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Re: All-Time Guilty Pleasure Songs - Planning

Post by Live in Phoenix »

jamieW wrote:
bonnielaurel wrote:
prosecutorgodot wrote:Maybe we should have a rule for this poll, disqualifying any songs in AM top 500 and artists in AM top 200. This might solve the popular artist sweeping problem.
Stevie Wonder's I Just Called to Say I Love You and Ebony and Ivory are often in lists of worst songs, so I think artists with high acclaim can still have a guilty pleasure song. Mull of Kintyre and Ob-La-Di Ob-La-Da come to mind as well.

I would include some of those songs from worst of all time lists, e.g. What's Up (4 Non Blondes), Don't Worry Be Happy, The Final Countdown... Also some teen pop, 80s synthpop (Wham!, Spandau Ballet...), Boney M., Samantha Fox, Julio Iglesias, a German schlager etc.
Bonnielaurel's absolutely right here - I could understand excluding songs down to a certain number, but all artists should be fair game. Part of the fun would be seeing some of the greatest artists of all-time showing up with songs that likely aren't their proudest moment. ("My Ding-a-Ling" would be a good example. Now there's one I actually can't stand, but I think I remember people on the forum admitting to liking it once.)

I'm wondering how strong the correlation will be between guilty pleasures and the time we were kids/teens. Probably more than half of my list will come from the eighties (including "Ebony and Ivory") when music was new to me and virtually everything sounded great.
Yes, even the greats have likely all recorded some embarrassing songs or even albums. (The trick would be that someone here would have to then like one of those songs. I know that My Ding-a-Ling has at least 1 fan here.)
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Re: All-Time Guilty Pleasure Songs - Planning

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Live in Phoenix wrote: I know that My Ding-a-Ling has at least 1 fan here.)
:whistle:
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Re: All-Time Guilty Pleasure Songs - Planning

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Also some ridiculous covers out there, like Cake's rendition of I Will Survive.

Most of my guilty pleasures will be in the late 90s just because that's the only period I got all my music from mainstream sources. After that I just didn't listen to endearingly bad songs enough for them to become endearing.
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Re: All-Time Guilty Pleasure Songs - Planning

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Speaking of Virtual Insanity, I've been wondering a bit.

I've always assumed the lyric "And now every mother can choose the color of her child, that's not nature's way" is talking about genetic designer babies. But given recent revelations about our hidden cultures and what we now know about Ace of Base, I'm starting to wonder if the direct literal interpretation is the correct one.
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Re: All-Time Guilty Pleasure Songs - Planning

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Jirin wrote:Speaking of Virtual Insanity, I've been wondering a bit.

I've always assumed the lyric "And now every mother can choose the color of her child, that's not nature's way" is talking about genetic designer babies. But given recent revelations about our hidden cultures and what we now know about Ace of Base, I'm starting to wonder if the direct literal interpretation is the correct one.
What do we now know about Ace of Base?
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Re: All-Time Guilty Pleasure Songs - Planning

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For me, a guilty pleasure would be a song that's complete, utter fluff but so impossibly catchy you like it anyway. I would say virtually any music directly aimed at tweens is an automatic. :mrgreen:

I love bad 70s pop so that will be well represented.
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Re: All-Time Guilty Pleasure Songs - Planning

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jamieW wrote:A question about the ranking, though: Does #1 represent our favorite guilty pleasure, or the overall song we feel guiltiest about? (For example, by far the song I feel the guiltiest for loving is an old high school favorite, "Heartbeat" by Don Johnson. However, if I was ranking guilty pleasures by how much I actually like them, I have others that would rank even higher.)
Great question. I'm ranking my list based on the former. Guilty is an attributive adjective in "guilty pleasure." Thus, your #1 should be your guiltiest pleasure.
StevieFan13 wrote:Dave Barry, the American humorist, once did a poll about the worst songs ever. MacArthur Park by Richard Harris was #1, followed by Yummy Yummy Yummy (I Got Love in My Tummy) at #2 and Havin’ My Baby at #3.
Here's a spotify playlist containing songs included in his book:

The playlist:


As I remember it, his main criteria for a bad song is the lyrical content. Admittedly, while some lyrics are questionable, does that make "Me and Bobby McGee", "Stairway to Heaven", "Whiter Shade of Pale", "Hey Jude", "Another Brick in the Wall", and some entries, bad songs?
jamieW wrote:
bonnielaurel wrote:
prosecutorgodot wrote:Maybe we should have a rule for this poll, disqualifying any songs in AM top 500 and artists in AM top 200. This might solve the popular artist sweeping problem.
I think artists with high acclaim can still have a guilty pleasure song.
Bonnielaurel's absolutely right here - I could understand excluding songs down to a certain number, but all artists should be fair game. Part of the fun would be seeing some of the greatest artists of all-time showing up with songs that likely aren't their proudest moment.
Seconded. I think, even those in the AM top 500 songs have guilty pleasure potential ("F**k tha Police", "I Will Survive", "Toxic") Guilty pleasures are really highly subjective.
Jirin wrote: To me a guilty pleasure song isn’t necessarily one that’s unpopular or unacclaimed, more one that if you played in public you’d expect weird looks. ;)
Buzzfeed has this funny article (https://www.buzzfeed.com/chozen/the-15- ... myL5mx2yOV) comparing a guilty pleasure song to embarrasing situations. Shame Level: 1 - Being slightly attracted to Grandma's roommate at the retirement home; 2 - Telling a bartender that you want "the usual" but they have no idea who you are; 3 - Getting caught making faces in a two-way mirror; 4 - Playing an embarrassing song out loud on your computer because you plugged your headphones into the wrong jack; 5 - Your parents chaperoning the school dance; 6 - Waving back at someone only to realize that they were waving to the person next to you; 7 - Still singing after someone turned the music off; 8 - Waking up with glitter all over your body but you can't remember why; 9 - Grinding on someone at a club only to realize that you're related when you see their face; 10 - A Freudian slip or two; 11 - Having a specific fedora for each season; 12 - Having lipstick on your teeth throughout an entire first date; 13 - Your parents knocking on your door and asking what you're doing during "private time."; 14 - Farting while bathing with someone.; 15 - Getting a non-ironic "YOLO" tattoo.
slick wrote:To me a "Guilty Pleasure" song is one that comes on the radio when you are in your car and when you get to a red light you roll up your windows so that no one hears what you are listening to. I feel a new playlist inspiration coming on...
Father2TheMan wrote:For me, a guilty pleasure would be a song that's complete, utter fluff but so impossibly catchy you like it anyway. I would say virtually any music directly aimed at tweens is an automatic. :mrgreen:
I am nodding my head in agreement with the ideas and opinions put forth so far. I have a "corny" playlist (as an excuse if someone fiddles with my smartphone/music library... don't judge me :whistle: ) which is my inspiration for coming up with this poll.
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Re: All-Time Guilty Pleasure Songs - Planning

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StevieFan13 wrote:
Jirin wrote:Speaking of Virtual Insanity, I've been wondering a bit.

I've always assumed the lyric "And now every mother can choose the color of her child, that's not nature's way" is talking about genetic designer babies. But given recent revelations about our hidden cultures and what we now know about Ace of Base, I'm starting to wonder if the direct literal interpretation is the correct one.
What do we now know about Ace of Base?
That I Saw The Sign is about the swastika.
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Re: All-Time Guilty Pleasure Songs - Planning

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Jirin wrote:
StevieFan13 wrote:
Jirin wrote:Speaking of Virtual Insanity, I've been wondering a bit.

I've always assumed the lyric "And now every mother can choose the color of her child, that's not nature's way" is talking about genetic designer babies. But given recent revelations about our hidden cultures and what we now know about Ace of Base, I'm starting to wonder if the direct literal interpretation is the correct one.
What do we now know about Ace of Base?
That I Saw The Sign is about the swastika.
Oh. Ooooooohhhhhhhhh. I knew the guy used to be a neo-Nazi but I didn't think that would slip in. Sweet Jesus. Is that considered actual fact or just a rumor? Cuz otherwise I don't think I can listen to that song again.
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Re: All-Time Guilty Pleasure Songs - Planning

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I have a hard time believing that Ace of Base songs are about anything. Also, I mean, a neighbor once told me that Marilyn Manson had 2 ribs removed to orally pleasure himself. And I heard that Rod Stewart had to have his stomach pumped of horse spunk, and that Marianne Faithfull incorrectly applied a candy bar...
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Re: All-Time Guilty Pleasure Songs - Planning

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Live in Phoenix wrote:I have a hard time believing that Ace of Base songs are about anything. Also, I mean, a neighbor once told me that Marilyn Manson had 2 ribs removed to orally pleasure himself. And I heard that Rod Stewart had to have his stomach pumped of horse spunk, and that Marianne Faithfull incorrectly applied a candy bar...
I think I'm just gonna not believe it for now. After all, life is demanding without understanding...that goofy pop songs are sometimes just goofy pop songs.
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Re: All-Time Guilty Pleasure Songs - Planning

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OMG, now I have "All that she wants is an Aryan baby, she's gone tomorrow boy" in my head! :angry-banghead: I also don't think any Ace of Base songs have hidden messages. Don't destroy my guilty pleasure. :mrgreen:
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Re: All-Time Guilty Pleasure Songs - Planning

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jamieW wrote:Since I've been listing "guilty pleasures" since first arriving on the forum, I'll undoubtedly participate in this. A question about the ranking, though: Does #1 represent our favorite guilty pleasure, or the overall song we feel guiltiest about? (For example, by far the song I feel the guiltiest for loving is an old high school favorite, "Heartbeat" by Don Johnson. However, if I was ranking guilty pleasures by how much I actually like them, I have others that would rank even higher.)
I don't think I could rate guilt by itself. Instead, I'm going to act like I'm drawing from my top 200,000 songs (small hyperbole).
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Re: All-Time Guilty Pleasure Songs - Planning

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Dexter wrote: 2. Post your list in another thread I'll be opening.
I will have a list of 100 (with brief commentary) ready to submit soon. I haven't seen a thread for posting yet?
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Re: All-Time Guilty Pleasure Songs - Planning

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Father2TheMan wrote:
Dexter wrote: 2. Post your list in another thread I'll be opening.
I will have a list of 100 (with brief commentary) ready to submit soon. I haven't seen a thread for posting yet?
I planned on creating one after Bleu is done with the Women Artists result. I expected more discussion on the idea of a "guilty pleasure." Ah heck, why not, I'll do it today.
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Re: All-Time Guilty Pleasure Songs - Planning

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Q - Guilty Pleasures! (from Rocklist.net)
Essential Playlist Of The 115 Records It’s OK To Love (September 2006)
“Made Up Of: 50 Q-Approved Tracks, 25 Q-Approved Albums (And 25 Extra Recommended Purchases), Five [Four] Celebrity Picks And A 10-Track Playlist From The Original Guilty Pleasures DJ: Sean Rowley.”

Tracks
1. Electric Light Orchestra – Livin’ Thing
2. Boston – More Than A Feeling
3. S Club 7 – Don’t Stop Movin’
4. 10cc – I’m Not In Love
5. Gary Glitter – Rock ‘N’ Roll Part 2
6. Foreigner – Cold As Ice
7. Billy Idol – Rebel Yell
8. Status Quo – Whatever You Want
9. Gerry Rafferty – Baker Street
10. Gloria Gaynor – I Will Survive
11. Rainbow – Since You’ve Been Gone
12. J Geils Band – Centerfold
13. Bryan Adams – Summer Of ‘69
14. All Saints – Never Ever
15. Shaggy – Mr Boombastic
16. Yes – Owner Of A Lonely Heart
17. Bangles – Manic Monday
18. Simple Minds – Don’t You (Forget About Me)
19. Cyndi Lauper – Time After Time
20. David Essex – Rock On
21. Nickelback – How You Remind Me
22. Barry Manilow – Mandy
23. Chicago – If You Leave Me Now
24. Marc Cohn – Walking In Memphis
25. Ronan Keating – Life Is A Rollercoaster
26. Mock Turtles – Can You Dig It?
27. Kim Carnes – Bette Davis Eyes
28. Eddy Grant – Electric Avenue
29. Spandau Ballet – Chant No. 1
30. Heatwave – Boogie Nights
31. Divinyls – I Touch Myself
32. Bloodhound Gang – Bad Touch
33. Kim Wilde – Kids In America
34. Christopher Cross – Ride Like The Wind
35. Dennis Waterman – I Could Be So Good For You
36. Alexander O’Neal – Criticize
37. Backstreet Boys – Larger Than Life
38. Asia – Heat Of The Moment
39. Proclaimers – Letter From America
40. Baz Luhrmann – Everybody’s Free To Wear (Sunscreen)
41. Cliff Richard – Devil Woman
42. Cheap Trick – Surrender
43. Sad Café – Every Day Hurts
44. Split Enz – I Got You
45. New Edition – Candy Girl
46. Babylon Zoo – Spaceman
47. Barbra Streisand – Woman In Love
48. Ricky Martin – Livin’ La Vida Loca
49. Jean Michel Jarre – Oxygène: Part IV
50. Kula Shaker – Tattva

Albums

1. Meat Loaf – Bat Out Of Hell
2. Supertramp – Breakfast In America
3. Hall & Oates – Private Eyes
4. Def Leppard – Hysteria
5. Billy Joel – The Stranger
6. ZZ Top – Eliminator
7. INXS – Kick
8. Dire Straits – Making Movies
9. Simply Red - Stars
10. Phil Collins – Face Value
11. Electric Light Orchestra – Out Of The Blue
12. Traveling Wilburys – Vol 1
13. Rush – Moving Pictures
14. Eurythmics – Revenge
15. Journey – Escape
16. Blue Öyster Cult – Agents Of Fortune
17. Counting Crows – August & Everything After
18. UB40 – Labour Of Love
19. Genesis – Invisible Touch
20. Big Country – The Crossing
21. Men At Work – Business As Usual
22. Richard Harris – A Tramp Shining
23. Steve Miller Band – Fly Like An Eagle
24. A-Ha – Hunting High & Low
25. Terence Trent D’Arby – Introducing The Hardline According To…

Albums Also Recommended…

The Order Of These Corresponds To The Above List. Ie Alan Parsons Project’ Turn Of A Friendly Card Is The Additional Recommendation To Supertramp’s Breakfast In America. These Are The Second Entries In Both Lists.
1. Meat Loaf – Bat Out Of Hell II: Back Into Hell
2. Alan Parsons Project – Turn Of A Friendly Card
3. Culture Club – Kissing To Be Clever
4. Cinderella – Long Cold Winter
5. Steve Winwood – Back In The Highlife
6. Stevie Ray Vaughan – SRV
7. Duran Duran – Notorious
8. Chris Rea – Road To Hell, Pt 2
9. Robbie Nevil – A Place Like This
10. Mike & The Mechanics – Beggar On A Beach Of Gold
11. Wizzard –EMI Years: Greatest Hits… And More
12. Ringo Starr – Ringo
13. Queensrÿche - Empire
14. Berlin – Count Three & Pray
15. REO Speedwagon – Hi Infidelity
16. Steppenwolf – Steppenwolf
17. Hootie & The Blowfish – Cracked Rear View
18. Fine Young Cannibals – Raw & The Cooked
19. Peter Gabriel – So
20. Men They Couldn’t Hang – Night Of A Thousand Candles
21. Katrina & The Waves - Katrina & The Waves
22. William Shatner – Has Been
23. Allman Brothers – At Fillmore East
24. Icehouse – Great Southern Land
25. Lenny Kravitz – Let Love Rule

Celebrities’ Guilty Pleasures
O Paul Heaton: Shakin’ Stevens – Cry Just A Little Bit / Roland Rat – Album
O Karen O: Paula Abdul – Straight Up / Forever Your Girl
O Sharon Osbourne: Bonnie Tyler – Total Eclipse Of The Heart / Ian Dury – Hit Me With Your Rhythm Stick
O Tim Westwood: Gnarls Barkley – Crazy

Sean Rowley’s Guilty Playlist
1. 10cc – Dreadlock Holiday
2. Dolly Parton – 9 To 5
3. Frankie Valli – Grease
4. Paul Simon – You Can Call Me Al
5. Boney M – Rivers Of Babylon
6. Barbra Streisand – Guilty
7. Electric Light Orchestra – Sweet Talkin’ Woman
8. Neil Diamond – Love On The Rocks
9. Hall & Oates – Maneater
10. John-Paul Young – Love Is In The Air
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Re: All-Time Guilty Pleasure Songs - Planning

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[Edit = double post]
Last edited by Dexter on Sun Mar 25, 2018 12:04 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: All-Time Guilty Pleasure Songs - Planning

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Weird seeing "I Will Survive" referred to as a guilty pleasure. At least that version of it. Might as well call Respect a guilty pleasure.
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Re: All-Time Guilty Pleasure Songs - Planning

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another one...

50 top guilty pleasures – bands and writers confess
http://www.nme.com/photos/50-top-guilty ... ss-1409620

Today we’re taking a look at the guilty pleasures of musicians and critics. Turns out they all have very different ideas of the concept. Slash on Rihanna: “One of my guilty pleasures is probably really attractive young pop singer females that can sing. I really think that’s sort of a turn on. She’s got a great voice.”

Dave Grohl: “I couldn’t get [Spice Girls’ ‘Two Become One’] out of my head, and it’s not even a dance song it’s just this slow love shit. Lord I love it I don’t know what to do! In Nirvana, Krist Novoselic joked that he was going to call his autobiography ‘What The Hell Was I Thinking?’ Now I know what he means. Do I need a shrink?”
Gavin Haynes, NME writer: “t.A.T.u.’s ‘All The Things She Said’ represented not so much a tarty ‘can you snog your friend for our cameras’ take on faux-lesbianism, as a canny new take on the outsider narrative of so much great pop. ‘It’s us versus the world,’ they professed, sexily, while Trevor Horn’s chorus of 600 guitars blazed. They were the Smiths of the early-noughties.”
Fraser McAlpine, NME writer: “I don’t feel remotely guilty for liking Soulja Boy‘s ‘Yahhh!’, a song which is objectively very bad indeed, but still rather brilliant. It’s just a very bratty, ungrateful moan about being harrassed by fans, over a cheap synth line you could play with your nose, and some shouting. It’s rubbish, but a LOT of fun.”
Ben Cardew, NME writer: “Enya’s ‘Orinoco Flow’ may be just about everything rock and roll isn’t – gibberish new age lyrics, an overwhelming sense of niceness and the judicious use of a harp – but, as the countless rave producers who have made use of it might agree, it’s a wildly catchy beast with a horribly great tune.”
BBC Radio 1’s Jen Long: “I like ‘That’s How You Know’ by Amy Adams. It’s from the film Enchanted. It makes me feel like a giggling girl. The lyrics, the sentiment, the shame.”
Miles Kane: “I love ‘Staying Alive’ by The Bee Gees. You could probably pick up on that.”
Mike Williams, NME Deputy Editor: “I have a weird infatuation with Lisa Loeb’s ‘Stay (I Missed You)’. What’s not to like? It’s catchy, it doesn’t really have a chorus, she’s got amazing glasses, it was on the Reality Bites soundtrack and I once had a dream where I was playing it on an acoustic guitar at the back of the school bus and loads of girls fancied me.”
Gary Jarman, The Cribs: “I think [The Bee Gees ‘Size Isn’t Everything’] is phenomenal – it’s one of my favourite albums. It’s the much maligned, late era of The Bee Gees, but the pop songs are fantastic. That’s really all that mattered to me. It was a big record for me when I was a kid.”
Ash Dosanjh, NME writer, has been caught listening to Five Star’s ‘System Addict’.
Jonathan Higgs, Everything Everything: “I suppose it’s our own music, actually. Sometimes I do listen to the demos we’re working on – which is understandable, and not that weird…”
Rebecca Schiller, NME writer: “Does anyone really know what Chumbawumba’s ‘Tubthumping’ means? Probably not. Does it matter? Not really. I remember buying this CD (and loving the weird purple baby on the cover) when I was 10. I brought it to a sleepover that night, and we had a massive singalong to this track. Plus it’s got a killer trumpet solo.”
Luke Lewis, NME.com Editor: Yes, Whitesnake’s ‘Here I Go Again’ is as stuffed full of lyrical cliches as David Coverdale’s crotch is stuffed full of gym socks, and yes the guitars are as epically overblown as the band’s haircuts at the time – but what a chorus! The perfect song to hear drunk at 3am with your best friends, shortly before vomiting into a plant pot.”
Matt Wilkinson, NME‘s New Music Editor: “From the very first time I heard about White Town’s ‘Your Woman’, I fell for this computer-classic. I don’t care what anyone says – it’s catchy as fuck, lyrically deceptive (“Your woman”? But you’re a bloke!) and equally eerie/freaky/weird. AKA everything wicked pop music should be.”
Ailbhe Malone, NME writer: “An embarrassing song that I really like is Dublin club classic ‘Maniac (2000)’. It’s a remix of the Flashdance theme tune by local DJ Mark McCabe (a bit like the Irish Tim Westwood) that has a rap section that I know all the words to.”
Tom Goodwyn, NME News Reporter: “The only good thing LeAnn Rimes ever did was ‘Can’t Fight The Moonlight’. This track is an absolute stormer. It’s rocking, it’s supremely catchy, it defies both her horrible pseudo country pop background and the bad film it soundtracks to be really good.”
Krissi Murison, NME Editor: “Is it wrong that of all the albums released in 2004, the one I actually still listen to the most is ‘Love Angel Music Baby’ by Gwen Stefani? Or that my favourite song on it wasn’t, y’know, ‘Tick Tock’ or ‘Hollerback’ or any of the universally-agreed good ones, but the teeth-rottingly cute, Akon featuring sap-fest ‘The Sweet Escape’?”
Alan Woodhouse, NME Senior Sub-Editor: “I personally don’t feel guilty about anything I like, but I suppose people would be surprised if I admitted that I love quite a lot of cheesy songs from my childhood – in particular, Starsky And Hutch actor David Soul‘s titanic UK chart-topping singles ‘Don’t Give Up On Us’ and ‘Silver Lady’.”
Priya Elan, NME.com Assistant Editor: “Yes, The Dream Academy’s ‘Life In A Northern Town’ might be available on a million terrible 80s compilations. Yes, it may contain a chant which makes many think of ‘The Lion Sleeps Tonight’, but to me it’s weird, magical and rather beautiful.”
Zach Blair, Rise Against: “I actually like the first Lily Allen record, ‘Alright, Still’. The song ‘Alfie’ was infectious for me.”
Liam Fray, The Courteeners: “I think the Lightening Seeds will be pretty good, they’re like a guilty pleasure.”
Paul Donoghue, Glasvegas: “My first ever album I bought was East 17’s ‘Steam’. I stuck by it. The best thing was this catalogue. I found it a few weeks ago. You could buy East 17 dogtags.”
Tom Edwards, NME writer, admits to loving Ke$ha’s ‘TiK ToK’.
Jazz Monroe, NME writer, enjoys the occasional spin of Destiny’s Child’s ‘Jumpin’ Jumpin’.
Rob Webb, NME writer, gets a bit of guilty pleasure from Billy Joel’s ‘We Didn’t Start The Fire’.
Anne Donahue, NME writer: “Right, so this should be listed under ‘intentionally ironic favourite’, but Boney M.’s ‘Rasputin’ has my heart ’till the end. Combining historical relevance, a killer beat and an excuse to dance like an idiot are the makings of a musical dream.”
Professor Green has admitted to loving Take That’s ‘Patience’.
Serj Tankian has admitted to enjoying the occasional play of Rihanna’s ‘Umbrella’.
Dev Hynes: “Cyndi Lauper is a big, big idol of mine. She isn’t a guilty pleasure, to me she is just as credible as the rest.”
Owen Pallett: “I don’t feel guilt about any pleasure. I’m a Bach glutton; I listen to Bach more than anything else and I play Bach at home for about an hour a day.”
Benjamin Curtis, School Of Seven Bells: “On one specific tour, we listened to the hell out of that David Archuletta album. I like simple songs that are about mundane situations. I can’t do that shit. My body naturally rejects it and knows it’s garbage, but then when I hear it, I’m so impressed. Like that horrible Black Eyed Peas song “I’ve Got a Feeling.”
Florent Lyonne, Jamaica: has confessed to liking Blackstreet’s ‘No Diggity’, Montell Jordan’s ‘Get It On Tonight’ and TLC’s ‘No Scrubs’.
Nick Carter, Backstreet Boys: “I have a lot of guilty pleasures! I’m not going to say it’s guilty, but [I’m] loving and absorbing so much Prince right now! I watched Purple Rain like three times in a row in the past week. I think it really doesn’t matter. It’s music.”
Tre Cool, Green Day: “One of my guilty pleasures is I listen to the On Broadway station on Sirius. When I’m alone.”
Lady Gaga: “I don’t want to hurt her feelings because she’s lovely – that Taylor Swift song ‘You Belong With Me’. Oh my God, when it comes on the radio I sing so loud, I’m so embarrassed.”
Henry Rollins: “With the advent of CDs, that ‘Best Of Kansas’ was one of the first purchases I made, along with some Madonna albums. Those new Boston remasters are so rockin’ I can’t stand it! Sometimes it is these records that hit the spot like no other, which, it seems to me, is one of the great things about music.”
Lincoln Parish, Cage The Elephant “I think [bandmate Dan Tichenor] likes that ‘Bulletproof’ song by La Roux. I don’t mind that song either.”
Theo Hutchcraft, Hurts: “Katy Perry. She’s kinda good. I mean, I can’t really work out whether I just like watching the videos on telly or…”
Slayer’s Tom Araya has fessed up to enjoying country music and Elvis Presley.
Scroobius Pip: “We used to cover ‘Push The Button’ by the Sugababes and that is a fucking brilliant song. It should be a guilty pleasure but I show no guilt at all about it. I’m one of the biggest Cyndi Lauper fans you’ll ever meet. She’s a legend, and I would never refer to it as a guilty pleasure.”
Mark Ronson: “I’m not embarrassed of my tastes as I’m an unabashed pop music fan. But I guess Phil Collins might count.”
Robbie Furze, The Big Pink: “My guilty pleasure is John Farnham’s ‘You’re The Voice’. It’s just incredible. One, the video’s incredible. The chorus is incredible. The video, the guitarist is pretty much dressed in Rambo. They’re all in trench coats.”
Kele Okereke: “I heard [Britney Spears’ ‘I Wanna Go] in a club a few weeks ago. I’d never heard it before, but I was quite surprised that I quite liked it. I think she’s probably someone I can feel guilty about liking, because she’s just a machine now.”
Romy Madley Croft, The xx: “I’m actually a bit of a Mariah Carey fan: ‘Fantasy’, ‘Heartbreaker’, ‘Dream Lover’, ‘Be My Baby’, all that.”
Bernard Sumner, Joy Division: “[Cassie’s ‘Long Way 2 Go’] is put together with not very much, but it’s still very effective. It’s quite a simple track and not with shitloads of overdubs.”
Gaz Coombes, Supergrass: “[The Edgar Winter Group’s ‘Free Ride’] is a really cheesy classic rock song which is perfect for driving down California’s Highway 1.”
Jack Steadman, Bombay Bicycle Club: “My girlfriend got me into [‘Upside Down’] because she’s obsessed with Diana Ross and she’s really into this track. When I heard it, ‘I thought yeah that’s a good song’. But I never expected to find myself actually dancing to it.”
Rab Allan, Glasvegas: “I went to see Take That a couple of weeks ago. But on the up side, Pet Shop Boys were supporting them. But I was surprised how good Take That were. Geraldine dragged me. I said I didn’t have a choice, but I kind of did.”
Big Boi: “I don’t know, maybe Conway Twitty. I listen to some Conway Twitty, but that’s not really embarrassing because to get your dick sucked to a Conway Twitty record is something else.”
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Dexter
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Re: All-Time Guilty Pleasure Songs - Planning

Post by Dexter »

Jirin wrote:Weird seeing "I Will Survive" referred to as a guilty pleasure. At least that version of it. Might as well call Respect a guilty pleasure.
I could see how "I Will Survive" would be a guilty pleasure to the 15-year old me whose ingrained societal machismo stereotype of being a heavy metal/alternative fanboy view playing/singing to disco songs, much less a disco anthem, in front of others as a very embarrassing situation. It reminds me of this scene from the movie 'In and Out.'
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Dexter
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Re: All-Time Guilty Pleasure Songs - Planning

Post by Dexter »

Another list that I think is relevant to this thread. I assume AOL’s not claiming all these songs are bad, just wussy; and considering that this forum is overwhelmingly male, I can see liking some of the songs below might be considered as guilty pleasure, though there are quiet a few questionable choices here.

AOL’s 111 Wussiest Songs Of All Time (2006)

111. ‘Do I Make You Proud’ – Taylor Hicks (2006)
110. ‘Seasons in the Sun’ – Terry Jacks (1974)
109. ‘Kiss Me’ – Sixpence None the Richer (1999)
108. ‘Wonderful Tonight’ – Eric Clapton (1977)
107. ‘What Hurts the Most’ – Rascal Flatts (2006)
106. ‘Break Up to Make Up’ – The Stylistics (1973)
105. ‘First Day of My Life’ – Bright Eyes (2005)
104. ‘Dancing in the Dark’ – Bruce Springsteen (1984)
103. ‘Daydream Believer’ – The Monkees (1968)
102. ‘People Are People’ – Depeche Mode (2006)
101. ‘I’m Into Something Good’ – Herman’s Hermits (1964)
100. ‘(I Just) Died in Your Arms Tonight’ – Cutting Crew (1986)
99. ‘Don’t Cry’ – Guns N’ Roses (1991)
98. ‘Against All Odds’ – Phil Collins (1984)
97. ‘Butterfly’ – Weezer (1996)
96. ‘I’m Not in Love’ – 10CC (1975)
95. ‘Hero’ – Enrique Iglesias (2001)
94. ‘Silly Love Songs’ – Paul McCartney (1976)
93. ‘Skyway’ – Replacements (1987)
92. ‘Mandy’ – Barry Manilow (1974)
91. ‘Angel’ – Shaggy (2000)
90. ‘Oh L’Amour’ – Erasure (1986)
89. ‘I Honestly Love You’ – Olivia Newton-John (1975)
88. ‘I Knew I Loved You’ – Savage Garden (1999)
87. ‘Open Arms’ – Journey (1982)
86. ‘Don’t Take the Girl’ – Tim McGraw (1994)
85. ‘Hey There Lonely Girl’ – Eddie Holman (1970)
84. ‘Crash’ – Dave Matthews Band (1996)
83. ‘You’re the Inspiration’ – Chicago (1984)
82. ‘I’m Not a Girl, Not Yet a Woman’ – Britney Spears (2001)
81. ‘On and On’ – Stephen Bishop (1977)
80. ‘Friday I’m in Love’ – The Cure (1992)
79. ‘The River’ – Garth Brooks (1991)
78. ‘Lovin’ You’ – Minnie Ripperton (1975)
77. ‘Scarborough Fair’ – Simon & Garfunkel (1968)
76. ‘To Be With You’ – Mr. Big (1991)
75. ‘I Need Love’ – LL Cool J (1987)
74. ‘I Want To Know What Love Is’ – Foreigner (1984)
73. ‘I Do (Cherish You)’ – 98 Degrees (1998)
72. ‘I’ll Make Love To You’ – Boyz II Men (1994)
71. ‘Iris’ – Goo Goo Dolls (1998)
70. ‘Crying in the Chapel’ – The Orioles (1953)
69. ‘You Had Me From Hello’ – Kenny Chesney (1999)
68. ‘Let Me Hold You’ – Bow Wow (2005)
67. ‘Kites Are Fun’ – The Free Design (1967)
66. ‘Burn’ – Usher (2004)
65. ‘Our House’ – Crosby, Stills, Nash & Young (1970)
64. ‘I Just Called To Say I Love You’- Stevie Wonder (1984)
63. ‘Please Please Please Let Me Get What I Want’ – The Smiths (1984)
62. ‘Time in a Bottle’ – Jim Croce (1973)
61. ‘Babe’ – Styx (1979)
60. ‘Too Shy’ - Kajagoogoo (1983)
59. ‘Someone Saved My Life Tonight’ - Elton John (1975)
58. ‘Bad Day’ – Daniel Powter (2005)
57. ‘She Believes In Me’ – Kenny Rogers (1979)
56. ‘Vindicated’ – Dashboard Confessional (2004)
55. ‘(Everything I Do) I Do It for You’ – Bryan Adams (1991)
54. ‘Leaving on a Jet Plane’ – Peter Paul and Mary (1969)
53. ‘2 Become 1′ – Spice Girls (1996)
52. ‘How Deep Is Your Love’ – Bee Gees (1977)
51. ‘Tutti Frutti’ – Pat Boone (1956)
50. ‘I’m in You’ – Peter Frampton (1977)
49. ‘Hero’ – Mariah Carey (1993)
48. ‘Just the Way You Are’ – Billy Joel (1977)
47. ‘Puppy Love’ – Donny Osmond (1972)
46. ‘Hip to Be Square’ – Huey Lewis (1986)
45. ‘Don’t Give Up On Us’ – David Soul (1976)
44. ‘Invisible’ – Clay Aiken (2003)
43. ‘Annie’s Song’ – John Denver (1974)
42. ‘When I’m 64′ – The Beatles (1967)
41. ‘You’ve Got a Friend’ – James Taylor (1971)
40. ‘God Must Have Spent a Little More Time on You’ – *NSYNC (1998)
39. ‘With Arms Wide Open’ – Creed (2000)
38. ‘Alone Again (Naturally)’ – Gilbert O’ Sullivan (1972)
37. ‘So Sick’ – Ne-Yo (2006)
36. ‘Beth’ – Kiss (1976)
35. ‘She’s Like the Wind’ – Patrick Swayze (1987)
34. ‘I’ll Be Missing You’ – Puff Daddy and The Family (1997)
33. ‘My Heart Will Go On’ – Celine Dion (1997)
32. ‘Think of Laura’ – Christopher Cross (1982)
31. ‘Let Her In’ – John Travolta (1976)
30. ‘Walking on Sunshine’ – Katrina and the Waves (1983)
29. ‘Muskrat Love’ – America (1976)
28. ‘Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go’ – Wham (1984)
27. ‘More Than Words’ – Extreme (1991)
26. ‘Precious and Few’ – Climax (1972)
25. ‘Superman (It’s Not Easy)’ – Five for Fighting (2001)
24. ‘All Outta Love’ – Air Supply (1980)
23. ‘Your Body Is a Wonderland’ – John Mayer (2001)
22. ‘You Light Up My Life’ – Debbie Boone (1997)
21. ‘True’ – Spandau Ballet (1983)
20. ‘Such Great Heights’ – Iron and Wine (2003)
19. ‘Right Here Waiting’ – Richard Marx (1989)
18. ‘I Believe I Can Fly’ – R. Kelly (1996)
17. ‘Close To You’ – Carpenters (1970)
16. ‘All By Myself’ – Eric Carmen (1976)
15. ‘Cry’ – Johnny Ray (1951)
14. ‘Dear Mama’ – Tupac (1995)
13. ‘You Don’t Bring Me Flowers’ – Neil Diamond & Barbra Streisand (1978)
12. ‘I Want It That Way’ – Backstreet Boys (1999)
11. ‘Hello’ – Lionel Richie (1984)
10. ‘Fix You’ – Coldplay (2005)
9. ‘If’ – Bread (1971)
8. ‘Do You Really Want to Hurt Me’ – Culture Club (1983)
7. ‘What’s Left of Me’ – Nick Lachey (2006)
6. ‘Longer’ – Dan Fogelberg (1979)
5. ‘Every Rose Has Its Thorn’ – Poison (1988)
4. ‘You’re Beautiful’ – James Blunt (2005)
3. ‘Ben’ – Michael Jackson (1972)
2. ‘Sometimes When We Touch’ – Dan Hill (1977)
1. ‘Shiny Happy People’ – R.E.M. (1991)

111. 'Do I Make You Proud' - Taylor Hicks (2006)
We're sure to get hate letters from the Soul Patrol for this one, but silver-haired 'American Idol' winner Hicks totally wussed out with this 100% soul-free first single. Blame it on evil 'A.I.' mastermind Simon Cowell -- he forced this ballad on Taylor.
110. 'Seasons in the Sun' - Terry Jacks (1974)
Originally intended for the Beach Boys, Terry Jacks' maudlin adaptation of Jacques Brel's 'Le Moribund' ('The Dying Man') was impossibly cloying and irony free. Ironically, it was also one of Kurt Cobain's favorite songs.
109. 'Kiss Me' - Sixpence None the Richer (1999)
Leigh Nash cooing gooey lyrics like "kiss me beneath the milky twilight" in her Tinkerbelle voice makes a heck of a case for this pop gem. That it appeared on the soundtrack to the equally tepid 'Dawson's Creek' seals the deal.
108. 'Wonderful Tonight' - Eric Clapton (1977)
Eric Clapton's romantic obsession with 'Layla' muse Patti Boyd also begot this quintessential prom theme. If 'Layla' is the sound of unrequited passion, 'Wonderful Tonight' is the sound of a man who has come to the realization that he's whipped.
107. 'What Hurts the Most' - Rascal Flatts (2006)
It's bad enough that lead singer Gary LeVox has a higher vocal range than Shania Twain, but to pair that voice with lyrics about a grown man crying over the one who got away? Now that is wussy.
106. 'Break Up to Make Up' - The Stylistics (1973)
In medieval opera, the castrati were the male singers whose voices were kept unnaturally high by virtue of castration. You might wonder about the equipment of Philadelphia's Stylistics, who gave us a remarkable run of falsetto hits including 'You Are Everything,' 'Betcha By Golly, Wow' and this classic tearjerker.
105. 'First Day of My Life' - Bright Eyes (2005)
It's hard for a love song played on an acoustic guitar not to sound wussy. But it's impossible once you add hushed, quivering vocals and lyrics about blankets on the beach. The fact that Connor Oberst has the physique of 12-year-old girl doesn't help either.
104. 'Dancing in the Dark' - Bruce Springsteen (1984)
If you're Bruce Springsteen, you've done quite well for yourself, thank you very much. If there's a single career moment that still haunts your dreams -- in pastel colors -- it's got to be the 'Flashdance'-era video for this feathery, synthesized blockbuster.
103. 'Daydream Believer' - The Monkees (1968)
It was 1968, so you'd be forgiven for thinking the daydreaming was inspired by some illicit activity. But the Monkees, by then a wildly successful establishment act with a network TV gig to protect, felt obliged to go the squeaky-clean route. The girl's the Homecoming Queen, for cripes' sake.
102. 'People Are People' - Depeche Mode (2006)
What does make a man hate another man? The heavily moussed boys of Depeche Mode ponder life's big questions on this other-cheek-turning electro popper. Dave Gahan's baritone firmly grabs the verse, but it's offset by Martin Gore's limp-wristed vocals.
101. 'I'm Into Something Good' - Herman's Hermits (1964)
These are the same twee chaps who brought us 'There's a Kind of Hush' and 'This Door Swings Both Ways' -- England's harmless answer to those hooligan Beatles. The singer and his girl dance close, he walks her home, she holds his hand . . . and it's impossible to imagine it going any further.
100. '(I Just) Died in Your Arms Tonight' - Cutting Crew (1986)
These British New Wavers died on the charts shortly after this swooning rocker helped the men of the '80s get in touch with their emotions. Not even Fabio got this mushy.
99. 'Don't Cry' - Guns N' Roses (1991)
If you're a sucker for Axl's softer side, Slash's dramatic, shirtless guitar solos and big-budget videos that look really cool but make no sense, then this weeper is the second best song of all time -- next to 'November Rain.'
98. 'Against All Odds' - Phil Collins (1984)
Apparently, there were a lot of breakups in 1984, as this despondent ode to lost love topped the chart. The song completed one of music's weirder transitions -- Collins, who began as the behind-the-scenes drummer for the once-bizarro prog rock group Genesis, had become a power balladeer, setting the stage for Michael Bolton.
97. 'Butterfly' - Weezer (1996)
Rock's most endearing geeks went all-out on this acoustic whiner that tells the familiar tale of a guy screwing up a good thing. He's sorry. Really sorry. Rivers Cuomo nails the point by apologizing three consecutive times at the end of the song . . . and emo is born.
96. 'I'm Not in Love' - 10CC (1975)
"Big boys don't cry," the whispering voice keeps telling us. They do if they pay too much attention to this ethereal hit from the summer of '75. Her picture still hangs on his wall only to hide a "nasty stain." That's one depressing room.
95. 'Hero' - Enrique Iglesias (2001)
Mock this drippy ballad all you want, but remember this: Iglesias' warbly vocals and icky lyrics helped him land gorgeous Russian tennis player Anna Kournikova. Yep, he's our hero too.
94. 'Silly Love Songs' - Paul McCartney (1976)
Tired of being teased by ex-mate John Lennon that he wrote "Muzak," the cute Beatle struck back with this: a wussy song about the very concept of the wussy song. As this list amply demonstrates, people really haven't had enough of silly love songs.
93. 'Skyway' - Replacements (1987)
The most devil-may-care alternative rock band of the '80s was already getting a little doughy when 'Pleased to Meet Me' came out. And on this, the album's little acoustic ditty, Paul Westerberg pretty much became Bread.
92. 'Mandy' - Barry Manilow (1974)
This first chart hit from the man who would continually reset the bar for pop wussiness was a No. 1 smash. Astonishing stat: 10 of Bar's first 11 hits topped the Adult Contemporary chart. But for God's sake, somebody kiss the guy already and stop him from shakin'.
91. 'Angel' - Shaggy (2000)
Here we have a performer called (of all things) Shaggy who's notorious for horny lyrics in songs titled 'Boombastic,' 'It Wasn't Me' and 'Freaky Girl.' Didn't he realize that this fluffy love song was a step backwards in the quest to become a sex god? Where was his wingman on this one?
90. 'Oh L'Amour' - Erasure (1986)
This synth-pop hip-shaker out-wusses the rest thanks to the syrupy, a capella intro that smothers the tune with a thick coat of melodrama before the drum machines even kick in. It could only be campier if Andy Bell were wearing a tutu while he sang it. Oh, wait a minute...
89. 'I Honestly Love You' - Olivia Newton-John (1975)
If you've ever wondered how a 30-year-old Australian got cast as hopelessly devoted teenybopper Sandy in 'Grease,' listen to this wad of heartfelt goo. Recorded four years before she skipped on over to Ridell High, John's first No. 1 is the very sound of female yearning.
88. 'I Knew I Loved You' - Savage Garden (1999)
The millennial Air Supply. The band name, borrowed from Anne Rice, is wildly misleading -- Savage Garden were nothing if not savagely non-threatening. Hiring Kirsten Dunst as the video's object of affection didn't make the group's biggest hit any more butch.
87. 'Open Arms' - Journey (1982)
The shamelessly manipulative ballad: Every big pop-rock act had to have at least one. After hearty, lusty rockers like 'Any Way You Want It' and 'Lovin', Touchin', Squeezin',' then mega-stars Journey let Steven Perry's squishy side lead on this gelatinous weepie.
86. 'Don't Take the Girl' - Tim McGraw (1994)
If Tim's high-pitched twang doesn't make you cringe, the song's lyrics sure will. He's about as manly as Faith Hill when he begs -- tail between his legs -- "don't take the girl."
85. 'Hey There Lonely Girl' - Eddie Holman (1970)
When R&B radio listeners flocked to record stores to buy this sublimely sweet single, they saw the name "Eddie" on the sleeve and muttered, "A guy sings this?" Decades later, Holman's smooth falsetto still fools the occasional slow dancer and car-commercial viewer.
84. 'Crash' - Dave Matthews Band (1996)
With these fairytale overtones, whispering vocals and desperate lyrics, Dave showed that he's more sensitive than the frat boys in the front row of his concerts. Oh, except for the "hike up your skirt a little more" part . . . 'cause that's a ballsy thing to say to a chick.
83. 'You're the Inspiration' - Chicago (1984)
If you entered "inspiration," "end of time," "heart & soul," "love" and "wussy" into an auto-song generator, this is the song it would spit out. Peter Cetera and co. were so unoffensive here, it's offensive. For the Muzak version, we imagine they just stripped out the vocals.
82. 'I'm Not a Girl, Not Yet a Woman' - Britney Spears (2001)
After three years of inspiring a billion barely-legal fantasies with her suggestive songs and peek-a-boo outfits, Britney reigned in the Lolita act and played the wide-eyed-and-innocent card on this pop confection, proving that even bubblegum pop tarts have ability to wuss out.
81. 'On and On' - Stephen Bishop (1977)
This one just about sums up the whole great decade in soft rock: Everybody's got a broken heart. Poor ol' Jimmy "puts on Sinatra and starts to cry"; Lonesome Sue "smiles when she feels like crying." In the mid-'70s -- energy crisis, Watergate, Vietnam -- who didn't?
80. 'Friday I'm in Love' - The Cure (1992)
The worst thing Robert Smith ever did was fall in love. After more than a decade of leading the goth army with songs soaked in wrist-slitting melancholia, the Cure frontman skipped into the Top 40 with this deliriously upbeat diddy about getting nookie at the end of the week.
79. 'The River' - Garth Brooks (1991)
This song makes the "King of Country" sound more like the queen. Or like Tony Robbins. With its chase-after-your-dreams message, it's the generic self-help book of music.
78. 'Lovin' You' - Minnie Ripperton (1975)
Opening with the soft sound of chirping birds outside the window, this song is as overtly sexy in its own way as a stack of Barry White and Donna Summer 12-inches. But that glass-shattering ululation Minnie musters is hardly soft.
77. 'Scarborough Fair' - Simon & Garfunkel (1968)
Based on a folk ballad dating back to the 1670s, there was nothing particularly rock 'n' roll about the S&G hit that immediately preceded 'Mrs. Robinson.' Neither parsley nor sage, rosemary nor thyme could spice up these placid proceedings.
76. 'To Be With You' - Mr. Big (1991)
The sole No. 1 hit for hard-rock shredders Mr. Big was more likely to be heard around a campfire than in a rock club. The follow-up single was 'Just Take My Heart,' further proof that sappy sells. Especially in Japan.
75. 'I Need Love' - LL Cool J (1987)
Homeboys have feelings too, and Mr. Smith deserves props for being the first to admit it. After searching both inside the closet and under the bedroom rug, he concluded his quest for intimacy with "I'll be waiting . . . I love you." Aww, no wonder the ladies adore him.
74. 'I Want To Know What Love Is' - Foreigner (1984)
After a hard-rockin' and hot-blooded '70s, our corporate-rock protagonist apparently encountered so much heartache and pain he didn't know if he could face it. Whaah. The gospel choir on the chorus seals in the wimpiness like a Ziploc baggy.
73. 'I Do (Cherish You)' - 98 Degrees (1998)
Four young meatheads who obviously listened to too much Boyz II Men are hardly the source for wisdom on the sanctity of marriage. With lyrics fit for a first grader and a music video featuring Screech from 'Saved by the Bell,' it's hard not to wince from this much wuss.
72. 'I'll Make Love To You' - Boyz II Men (1994)
Their rivals may have been bumping and grinding their way up the charts, but Boyz II Men's desires were more wholesome. Any sensual deed would be initiated by the lady and, of course, performed only in the manner she preferred. A true gentleman knows that passion is no excuse for rudeness.
71. 'Iris' - Goo Goo Dolls (1998)
Nothing shreds the last ounce of manliness left in your music career like recording a dramatic power ballad set to synthesized violins and placing it on the soundtrack to a Meg Ryan movie . . . right next to Sarah McLachlan, Alanis Morissette and Paula Cole.
70. 'Crying in the Chapel' - The Orioles (1953)
Like the baseball team of the same name, this doo-wop crew hailed from the streets of Baltimore. However, hardball was not these birds' game, as they relied on ladykiller Sonny Til's silky baritone. This churchy weeper was so smooth that Elvis would later cover it.
69. 'You Had Me From Hello' - Kenny Chesney (1999)
Note to Kenny Chesney: Imitating Tom Cruise is a bad idea. The star-struck country hero wrote this song after watching 'Jerry Maguire,' in which Cruise utters these famous words to Chesney's future bride, Renee Zellweger. As for the marriage, we think the song's chorus lasted longer.
68. 'Let Me Hold You' - Bow Wow (2005)
What's the first thing a young rapper does to assert his manhood? Make a love song, silly! In jacking classic Luther Vandross and enlisting a pubescent Omarion, Bow Wow poked out his bird chest and proved his rhymes could be as sappy as the next man's.
67. 'Kites Are Fun' - The Free Design (1967)
Folk singers had a wealth of inspiration in the late '60s: war, race riots, a sexual revolution. Breezy brothers and sister combo Chris, Bruce and Sandy Dedrick preferred to focus on simpler matters. And they sang the truth: Kites are fun.
66. 'Burn' - Usher (2004)
Usher used an entire album to rid himself of the guilt he built up cheating on TLC's Chili -- and sold 11 million copies along the way. But his gutsy 'Confessions' take a turn for the wuss on this track when he cries, "Man I don't know what I'm gonna do without my boo-ooh."
65. 'Our House' - Crosby, Stills, Nash & Young (1970)
It opens with flowers in a "vahz" and only gets more precious from there. Written for Joni Mitchell during their period of blissful cohabitation in her Laurel Canyon bungalow, when Graham Nash lapses into all those "la la"s on the bridge, we can't help but hear him mocking himself.
64. 'I Just Called To Say I Love You' - Stevie Wonder (1984)
Stevie, we love you. Really, we do. Therefore, we must be honest: As sweet as an impromptu phone call to express one's feelings is, the ensuing reflection on summer rains and chocolate-covered candy hearts is overkill.
63. 'Please Please Please Let Me Get What I Want' - The Smiths (1984)
Morrissey's famous moan graced every Smiths song there ever was, but it reached new levels of hopelessness on this shameless plea for affection. Writhing in self-pity and good manners, this tune remains the most castrated song of the Modern Rock era.
62. 'Time in a Bottle' - Jim Croce (1973)
Waltz time is a direct, foolproof route to wussiness. No, you don't mess around with Jim, the guy who also gave us 'Bad, Bad Leroy Brown,' but he's feeling more than a little fragile here.
61. 'Babe' - Styx (1979)
Regardless of how big of a "babe" she was, what self-respecting man hands over all of the credit for his "courage and strength" to his lady? Dennis DeYoung, a man who stopped touring because of his aversion to bright lights, that's who!
60. 'Too Shy' - Kajagoogoo (1983)
For New Wave fans who thought A Flock of Seagulls were just too darn edgy, there was Kajagoogoo. This alternately pouty and bouncy MTV hit made singer Lamal and his fellow bleached-blonde Brits household names . . . briefly. Quick, name another Kajagoogoo song.
59. 'Someone Saved My Life Tonight' - Elton John (1975)
Sure, this song is about running away from a "prima donna" who almost bullied Elton into marrying her. But Captain Fantastic's life was saved by a friend he calls "sugar bear." Enough said.
58. 'Bad Day' - Daniel Powter (2005)
You voted a million times, but your favorite 'American Idol' still lost. Don't despair, because Daniel Powter's showstopper came to the rescue on every episode, admonishing your fallen karaoke hero to suck it up and move on.
57. 'She Believes In Me' - Kenny Rogers (1979)
Talk about your false modesty: He knows he won't change the world with his "little songs." Meanwhile, she's lying in bed at home waiting for the big lug. When he belts the line "I'll never know just what she sees in me," we sure can see where he's coming from.
56. 'Vindicated' - Dashboard Confessional (2004)
We're not sure what "slow spinning redemption is," but we bet it's pretty wimpy. Even two sleeves of tattoos and the inclusion of his song in a superhero flick can't make Mr. Dashboard tough, but we have no doubt that his songs of raw emotion get him laid.
55. '(Everything I Do) I Do It for You' - Bryan Adams (1991)
Arguably the high (low?) point in a hit-making career heavily bogged down in schmaltz, which is another word for lard. Bonus points for serving as the theme song for 'Robin Hood' -- a Kevin Costner flick.
54. 'Leaving on a Jet Plane' - Peter Paul and Mary (1969)
Written by heavyweight wuss John Denver, who died . . . in a plane crash. Ouch.
53. '2 Become 1' - Spice Girls (1996)
Titular use of numbers in place of letters aside, '2 Become 1' makes the list for its romanticization of booty calls. The strings, desperately sappy lyrics and hint, nay, whisper of a safe sex message take all the shame out of quietly sneaking home at 6 a.m.
52. 'How Deep Is Your Love' - Bee Gees (1977)
They're remembered as the pop act that got huge off disco, but what the Brothers Gibb truly excelled at was mournful melancholia. 'To Love Somebody' and 'How Can You Mend a Broken Heart' both became sad-sack standards, and this No. 1 smash was only marginally more optimistic.
51. 'Tutti Frutti' - Pat Boone (1956)
Thanks, Pat. You took all the fire and fury (not to mention rhythm and blues) out of Little Richard's seminal hit and turned it into a sanitized schmaltzfest. At least you made Richard a millionaire in the process.
50. 'I'm in You' - Peter Frampton (1977)
... You're in me? Whatever sort of love affair was going on here, Frampton charted higher with this dainty single (No. 2) than any of the blockbuster hits off his previous breakthrough album, 'Frampton Comes Alive.'
49. 'Hero' - Mariah Carey (1993)
Even the recording academy thought this hit was too sugary for its own good. Despite the song's presence at telethons, tributes and kiddie concerts, the '95 Grammy for Pop Female Vocalist went to Sheryl Crow's 'All I Wanna Do.' Proof that fun in the sun trumps multi-octive soul-searching.
48. 'Just the Way You Are' - Billy Joel (1977)
An instant cocktail-hour classic that featured a sax solo as creamy as a chocolate mousse, this definitive Adult Contemporary hit made Joel the envy of all sensitive males. "Don't go changing," he sang. Then he divorced his first wife and married Christie Brinkley.
47. 'Puppy Love' - Donny Osmond (1972)
If only he'd waited to hit puberty before branching out from the family act: Donny's first solo hit sounds like it was sung by Marie.
46. 'Hip to Be Square' - Huey Lewis (1986)
Huey Lewis, an Ivy Leaguer as a graduate of Cornell University, put his pocket protector on his sleeve and tried to convince the rest of us that it's actually cool to be a goody-goody. T'yeah! It's a darn shame this song never found its way to an after-school special.
45. 'Don't Give Up On Us' - David Soul (1976)
Before this singer-turned-actor became famous as Starsky's Hutch, he was a regular on 'The Merv Griffin Show.' Appearing as the Covered Man, he performed folk songs in a ski mask. We kid you not.
44. 'Invisible' - Clay Aiken (2003)
After belting out power ballads with Meat Loaf-like intensity on the show, the 'American Idol' salutatorian released this bashful, watered-down single about being too timid (and, apparently, transparent) to approach his heart's true desire. Maybe this is why Clay turned to online dating.
43. 'Annie's Song' - John Denver (1974)
This John Denver classic will fill up your senses -- and exercise your gag reflexes. It's the perfect song for swaying back and forth 'round a campfire. So, anyone up for a sing-along? We didn't think so.
42. 'When I'm 64' - The Beatles (1967)
No less icky now that Sir Paul has in fact turned 64, this song is a prime example of McCartney's affection for "the old rooty-tooty music" (as producer George Martin once called it) of his father's generation. Any Beatles fanatics out there whose grandkids are actually called Vera, Chuck, and Dave?
41. 'You've Got a Friend' - James Taylor (1971)
Putting capital 'L' in Lite FM, this '70s folk rocker made us all feel cuddly, safe and warm inside with this super-sappy Carole King snoozer about cheering up the lonely, sad and pathetic. This is the 'Had a Bad Day' of the '70s.
40. 'God Must Have Spent a Little More Time on You' - *NSYNC (1998)
Guys dig this song because they think chicks dig it. Chicks dig this song because they think guys actually mean it when they say they dig this song. God digs it because of the shout-out.
39. 'With Arms Wide Open' - Creed (2000)
Scott Stapp celebrated the birth of his son by proclaiming in his Eddie Vedder-wannabe growl, "We stand in awe, we've created life." Thankfully, he also had the self-awareness to admit, "If I had just one wish . . . I hope he's not like me."
38. 'Alone Again (Naturally)' - Gilbert O' Sullivan (1972)
The guy's been stood up at the altar, his folks both dropped dead, even his God has deserted him. Now he's going to "treat" himself by jumping off a nearby tower. Oh, the humanity!
37. 'So Sick' - Ne-Yo (2006)
We've all been there. Post breakup, you find yourself sleeping in the T-shirt he left behind or refusing to wash the scent of her perfume from your pillow. Luckily, R&B's newest star put these emotions into words and gave us all the courage to finally move on.
36. 'Beth' - Kiss (1976)
Like Ringo, drummer Peter Criss got a token song on each Kiss album. How this henpecked apology got past uber-misogynist Gene Simmons, we may never know. Just imagine the razzing Criss must have taken whenever the missus phoned the studio and nagged him to come home.
35. 'She's Like the Wind' - Patrick Swayze (1987)
Just as we applauded Swayze as the dirty dancing man's man who refused to let Baby be put in a corner, the actor released this flimsy ballad. Though his singing isn't half-bad, the cheese factor caused the tune to dissipate as quickly as the air itself.
34. 'I'll Be Missing You' - Puff Daddy and The Family (1997)
Further confusing those who thought the Police's 'Every Breath You Take' was a love song, Puffy turned it into this sappy hip-hop tribute to his fallen friend B.I.G. Awkward moment of the year: Sting singing backup at the 1997 MTV VMAs.
33. 'My Heart Will Go On' - Celine Dion (1997)
After 'Titanic' broke every box-office record imaginable, Celine Dion's "love theme" from the film was inescapable to all but those under jury sequester. The bright side of the nauseating phenomenon? Years of sketch comedy material to come.
32. 'Think of Laura' - Christopher Cross (1982)
We are terribly sorry for the loss of Christopher's friend, Laura. And we do think she would laugh, not cry, if she heard the high-pitched vocals on this cheesy tribute. Did Christopher skip puberty?
31. 'Let Her In' - John Travolta (1976)
Vinnie Barbarino wouldn't be caught dead singing this, and Danny Zuko would probably sucker-punch its love-struck songwriter. "I'm different today," the aspiring singer-actor sang. Different from the characters that made his career, maybe: Here he plays a doormat.
30. 'Walking on Sunshine' - Katrina and the Waves (1983)
The title alone could qualify this hopelessly fizzy ditty. Optimism is for suckers!
29. 'Muskrat Love' - America (1976)
Yep, even semi-aquatic rodents got it on in the '70s. In addition to jitterbugging and tangoing, Muskrat Suzie and Sam enjoyed "doing it right" by candlelight. British lightweights America failed to crack the Top 40 with this ditty, but, unfortunately, the Captain & Tennille tried again three years later . . . and squirmed their way to No. 4.
28. 'Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go' - Wham (1984)
Maybe it was the way George Michael rhymed "go-go" with "yo-yo." Perhaps it's because he compared the sun to Doris Day -- back when he wasn't openly gay. Whatever the reason, listen between the lines and you'll hear why the Whammer was left sleeping while his partner went out to boogie.
27. 'More Than Words' - Extreme (1991)
After this long-haired Boston foursome failed to hit big with heavy metal, they went straight for the sell-out ballad, complete with the requisite acoustic-guitars-on-stools video. More common at '90s high school dances than spiked punch.
26. 'Precious and Few' - Climax (1972)
With their shaggy hair and hip threads, these L.A. boys looked like rockers, but fructose -- not feedback -- poured out of their amps. This, their lone top 10 hit, was so sweet that it would be come a staple for TV commercials . . . alongside kiddies and puppies.
25. 'Superman (It's Not Easy)' - Five for Fighting (2001)
If your band is named for the hockey penalty for brawling, you've got no business feeling sorry for yourself.
24. 'All Outta Love' - Air Supply (1980)
Robbed! That's what these Aussie wussies must feel about the indignity of seeing 23 titles above theirs. And they did everything right: woe-inducing string arrangements, insipid heartsick lyrics, a chorus that repeats itself 9,000 times -- with more and more emotion. Damn, this competition is tough.
23. 'Your Body Is a Wonderland' - John Mayer (2001)
We know, we know -- he's like, a respected blues guitarist now, right? But let's not forget that this boyish singer-songwriter once broke hearts with breathy, sugar-soaked songs. God knows how he pulled off lyrics like "candy lips and bubblegum toes" without getting a beatdown by boyfriends everywhere.
22. 'You Light Up My Life' - Debbie Boone (1997)
Hey, it's not her fault -- Pat Boone's her dad. With a whopping 10 weeks spent at No. 1, this song falls squarely (and we do mean squarely) in the great tradition of spiritual treacle disguised as secular love songs.
21. 'True' - Spandau Ballet (1983)
Any band with the word "ballet" in its name is predestined to score high on the wuss meter. Add a lead signer who belts his lyrics with the overcooked, show-tune enthusiasm of Tony Hadley and the deal is sealed.
20. 'Such Great Heights' - Iron and Wine (2003)
The Postal Service originally delivered this love song with poppy synthesizers and sickeningly optimistic lyrics, so it has a level of wussness baked in. But have Iron and Wine cover it, put it on the 'Garden State' soundtrack and use it in an M&M's commercial, and you have yourself a wussy homerun.
19. 'Right Here Waiting' - Richard Marx (1989)
Richard Marx owes the public two apologies: One for the mullet and another for this mopey ballad, which still pops up just when we think it's safe to get our teeth cleaned.
18. 'I Believe I Can Fly' - R. Kelly (1996)
When Kenny G. covers your song, it's official -- your testosterone is waning. Backed by a full orchestra and choir, Kells' growing self-esteem left him poised in a cornfield ready for take-off. Now facing a child pornography trial, he probably wishes he really did have wings.
17. 'Close To You' - Carpenters (1970)
The Carpenter siblings laid the groundwork for an unparalleled career in low self-esteem with their first big hit, a No. 1 tune written by Burt Bacharach and Hal David. Why do birds suddenly appear? Depends what kind. Vultures? Chicken hawks?
16. 'All By Myself' - Eric Carmen (1976)
Carmen's Raspberries were one of the power-pop firecrackers of the '70s. Going solo evidently sucked all the spark out of the poor shlub. This one gets the nod over 'Never Gonna Fall in Love Again,' another all-time pity party: It came first and charted higher.
15. 'Cry' - Johnny Ray (1951)
Poor 'ol Johnny Ray indeed. This pretty-boy '50s crooner didn't just sing about crying -- he practically cried about it. This gushy hit made teenage girls want to take this sad sack home and mother him. Their boyfriends just wanted to give him a real reason to cry.
14. 'Dear Mama' - Tupac (1995)
Code of the streets No. 1: Show love to no woman. Yet when 'Pac rapped, "Even as a crack fiend mama, you always was a black queen mama," he proved the rule's exception and caused thugs everywhere to wipe their eyes. One tear only, though. Any more than that, and you'd be a buster.
13. 'You Don't Bring Me Flowers' - Neil Diamond & Barbra Streisand (1978)
It's the merging of guilty pleasures. Neil meets Babs in a violin-ridden tale of love that's expired like their careers. "You don't bring me flowers; you don't sing me love songs . . ." Sounds like an episode of 'Dr. Phil.'
12. 'I Want It That Way' - Backstreet Boys (1999)
"Tell me why" every Backstreet Boys song didn't make its way to this list? A sonic assault of sappy that stuck in your head like a bullet, this song's cloying chorus and the Boys' accompanying choreography were just screaming for a playground beatdown.
11. 'Hello' - Lionel Richie (1984)
Over a spare piano melody, the R&B romantic -- and daddy to Nicole -- sings of unrequited love. The woman he loves has no idea he exists, but that's not the point. He really cares for her. After all, isn't that why we all stalk people?
10. 'Fix You' - Coldplay (2005)
These British softies apparently didn't get the memo that 'Dawson's Creek' had been cancelled when they wrote this weeper. Luckily, the producers of 'The O.C.' love syrupy ballads, and frontman Chris Martin managed to outwhine the show's mighty Cohen.
9. 'If' - Bread (1971)
The uncontested champions of wuss, these hair-parted-in-the-middle, slacks-wearing California boys have forgotten more classic whimperings than James Blunt will ever write. Nothing showed off sensitivity to the ladies like a 'Best of Bread' 8-track. By comparison, the Eagles were Slayer.
8. 'Do You Really Want to Hurt Me' - Culture Club (1983)
While most '80s icons were out scoring with models, Boy George spent his free time weeping in his studio. Torn apart by his turbulent love affair with his Club's closeted drummer, the cross-dressing pop queen poured his heart out on this mid-tempo tearjerker. Listen closely and you can almost hear his mascara running.
7. 'What's Left of Me' - Nick Lachey (2006)
Newly-divorced Nick got his heart broken by mean ol' Jessica, and it spawned this syrupy serenade. He may be "half the man," but getting half the money can't be all that bad, can it?
6. 'Longer' - Dan Fogelberg (1979)
Of the lawsuits holding musicians responsible for violent lyrics, comedian Denis Leary once quipped, "Does that mean I can sue Dan Fogelberg for making me into a ##### in the mid-'70s." After citing a couple of this song's Hallmark-card metaphors, the prosecution could rest.
5. 'Every Rose Has Its Thorn' - Poison (1988)
Poison's rampant hedonism was just a cry for help from the band's secret, inner wuss. If the lipgloss didn't give it away, lyrics like "instead of makin' love, we both made our separate ways" exposed the guys as a bunch of softies. Any real metalhead would know that roses are only cool when paired with guns or tattoos.
4. 'You're Beautiful' - James Blunt (2005)
It's the classic, tragic love story: Stoned man sees pretty girl on subway, girl exits with boyfriend, man loses will to live . . . all set to a #####in' Spanish guitar riff menacing enough to evoke Wham's 'Careless Whisper.'
3. 'Ben' - Michael Jackson (1972)
Long before he was accused of anything unsavory, Michael Jackson's mind was in the gutter -- singing this screechy love song to a rat. Yep, Ben, the protagonist of the movie of the same name, was a heckuva guy, but he ate garbage. We wish we could say that rodent love songs stopped here, but see also 'Muskrat Love.'
2. 'Sometimes When We Touch' - Dan Hill (1977)
It doesn't get much softer than this soft-rock classic from a Torontonian who barely got it up for one more Top 40 hit a decade later. He wants to cuddle his beloved "til the fear in me subsides." By the sound of things, that could be awhile.
1. 'Shiny Happy People' - R.E.M. (1991)
Disowned by the band on its 2003 greatest-hits album despite being one of the critically adored "college rock" group's biggest chart successes, 'Shiny Happy People' is a case in point that irony doesn't always translate. (That's why they created emoticons ;-) Supposedly written in response to the horrific Tiananmen Square massacre in Beijing in 1989, the song finds poetic lyricist Michael Stipe borrowing from a bit of Chinese propaganda roughly interpreted as "shiny happy people holding hands." But the finished product was no trenchant political statement from a human-rights warrior exercising the power of his celebrity. Instead, it was an anthemic lobotomy, precisely the kind of pop puffery the band meant to skewer.
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StevieFan13
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Re: All-Time Guilty Pleasure Songs - Planning

Post by StevieFan13 »

I don't much care for the hyper-masculine idea of a "wussy" song, especially when it gets borderline homophobic (like the Wham! entry). Can't say the label doesn't apply for a lot of the songs though (even the ones I like).
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Jirin
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Re: All-Time Guilty Pleasure Songs - Planning

Post by Jirin »

Yeah, real men don't express their emotion by opening up and being vulnerable to people, they express their emotion by channeling it as anger directed indistriminantly at the nearest soft target!

I think there is a distinction to be made between "Hurr hurr song express emotion emotion dumb" and "No seriously, this song is excessively gushy, whiny and oversensitively reacting to first world problems." This list is not making that distinction.

Stuff like I Believe I Can Fly I wouldn't categorize as 'wussy' so much as 'Syruppy market research driven pandering'.
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StevieFan13
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Re: All-Time Guilty Pleasure Songs - Planning

Post by StevieFan13 »

Jirin wrote:Yeah, real men don't express their emotion by opening up and being vulnerable to people, they express their emotion by channeling it as anger directed indistriminantly at the nearest soft target!

I think there is a distinction to be made between "Hurr hurr song express emotion emotion dumb" and "No seriously, this song is excessively gushy, whiny and oversensitively reacting to first world problems." This list is not making that distinction.

Stuff like I Believe I Can Fly I wouldn't categorize as 'wussy' so much as 'Syruppy market research driven pandering'.
Just look at the "Every Rose Has Its Thorn" entry - that fits your idea of the stereotyping to a T.
Music is a world within itself, with a language we all understand - Sir Duke (1976)
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StevieFan13
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Re: All-Time Guilty Pleasure Songs - Planning

Post by StevieFan13 »

Also, anyone who calls "Dear Mama" a wussy song is so missing the point it's unbelievable. A rapper showing vulnerability in a rap sub-genre that decries vulnerability? Must be a wuss!
Music is a world within itself, with a language we all understand - Sir Duke (1976)
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Re: All-Time Guilty Pleasure Songs - Planning

Post by StevieFan13 »

Isn't anyone gonna try and submit more lists before the deadline?
Music is a world within itself, with a language we all understand - Sir Duke (1976)
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