Today I updated from #2573 (CHVRCHES' Every Eye Open) to #2608 (Yo La Tengo's I Am Not Afraid of You and I Will Beat Your Ass).
No time for notes, because today's album inspired me. The album was Every Eye Open by CHVRCHES and this is the image I use:
This, dear people, is what we call the letter V. I would like to tell you here how it is pronounced, but the only way to do this is to say it sounds like a V. Following this, you might think that the letter V is usually used to make clear that a particular letter in a word is pronounced like a V. You would be right. There are odd exceptions, like how in Spain they tend to pronounce V as a B, just to be different. Still, we communicate here in English and there is an unspoken understanding here that a V is indeed a V.
What a V definitely is not is a U. They look similar, sure, but they have different pronunciations. To make this clear they made a simple, but very noticeable design choice: the V is a sharp downward point, whereas the U has a rounded downside.
Of course, things were made more difficult with the W. It is called a double-u in English, even do it clearly looks like a double v (notice the two sharp points downward in V). This is a mistake that should be corrected as soon as possible and I think we should e grateful only the English language went wrong here. Still, despite it's complex name, everybody seems to understand the basic function of the W rather well. I won't blame any mistakes regarding the V and U on the W.
Now, there is this Scottish band called CHVRCHES. Now I won't hold it against it that Scottish people feel the need to compensate for something and write their band names in capitals. We all make childish mistakes like that, because we think they are cool, even though everyone around us knows better. No, the capitals are not the problem here. The problem is that Scottish, although a dialect, is an English language and they use the English pronunciation of the V. They don't pronounce it as U. And yet, here we are, with a band named CHVRCHES. We are meant to say Churches (yes, we don't need to actually yell it either).
But I can't!
I can't mentally say a U when I see a V. My mind is not trained to do this. If my mind could do it, it would not be able to read. Chaos would ensue, because each letter would get a new meaning. To me, this band is called chvrches, and that is not pretty to say (and rather pretentious for a band who make simple pop songs). Churches are holy buildings; chvrches are not a thing and neither should they be.
Of course this wasn't without precedent. Remember when movies use to do this frequently? You got stupid titles like Se7en (Sesevenen) and L4yer Cake (Lfouryer Cake) (by the way, the 7 doesn't look all that much like a V, even less so than the U). Prince liked this kind of thing to, but at least song titles I Would Die 4 U and Nothing Compares 2 U; it's still stupid as hell, but you mentally say the right thing. Unless he wanted us to pronounce it like I Would Die for V and Nothing Compares Two V, than he's to blame for this whole article.
Let's get serious, people. Now is to time to appreciate what language gave us. They gave us to V and the U to better communicate through the written word. Imagine if you had to swap these to in this whole text; it would become unreadable. Let's make this world a better place for V's, U's, W's and all other written symbols, so we can better understand each other and finally achieve peace.
Also, CHVRCHES made an album named Every Eye Open. Pop music as bland as it get to me. I refuse to give them one more letter.